Why such a grim title? Because, after grim, comes glee :P :D
One of my greatest failures in my life has been: Failure to continue an argument and win it :-) The reasons of my failure are so straight-forward that I feel it does not make sense. I mean, one should be able to argue and win, no? That's like an accomplishment, isn't it? I don't know. What I know is: even if I start an argument, I feel it is based on a selfish need & hence is unnecessary, and so either I apologize, or I justify why I said that, but I don't see sense in continuing it simply because it disturbs "peace".
Moreover, ever since I grew up to start making friends, going to school, somehow the elders always picked me up to 'solve' situations, 'monitor' kids etc. etc. things that I perhaps never wanted to do, deliberately. But my natural obedience towards elders led me to listen more, analyze more, and arrive at solutions. I never got a chance to 'create disputable situations', or, argue over a matter to reach a conclusion, and thanks to my mom, even if I wanted to argue over things, she always taught me: You should try to look at your faults first, correct them, forgive others, and learn to become a better person from the whole experience. As a small kid, I obeyed her. And on doing it as a habit, it became a part of my natural trait. I never learnt to continue even my own arguments, forget about winning them. In the corporate world, where people pitch for their cases of promotion, argue over things to verbally assert their high-performance, I've only managed to objectively state my achievements, and hence could never sound strong enough, for a winning candidate. And somehow I feel.....when you objectively state something, they don't take you seriously, & perhaps they doubt your ability to perform if they trust you with a bigger responsibility.
However, all this grim side has a glee side to it: my favourite side. The glee side is: I've learnt to grow up faster as a more mature person, I've learnt to bless others even if I didn't get what I wanted, I've learnt to be humble, I've learnt to accept every person the way they are, I've learnt to wish for others' happiness because I feel great when people are happy even when my happiness is at stake, I've learnt to make peace among people, I've learnt to bring people closer & love more, I've learnt to be more sensitive towards other people's needs, I've learnt to seek the deeper truths of life & found them, I've learnt about the existence of God and love Him, I've learnt to sacrifice, and I've learnt to be selfless. Having learnt all of this, I've learnt to be at peace, under all circumstances.
And the best part that is above and beyond all the grim & the glee is: FAITH :-) You know what faith is like? Faith is like: Suppose there is something that you "logically" don't think will happen because of the existing factors that govern the 'happening of that thing'. But if you stay happy, and don't doubt it at all, don't fret about it, and blindly keep the faith instead, that thing actually happens! Out of my incapability to argue, and strong urge to maintain peace and wanting other people's happiness, I've developed a deep faith in God :-) The faith that He is the ultimate doer, and He is doing the best.
One may wonder what is this post all about? :D It is about one trait of failure and many gifts of success :-)
Keep the smile on ! :-)
Mishti.
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